TRANCE_atlantico: Who are you?

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Who are you?

vía SAMBA Blog de Al Pittampalli el 16/04/09

Who are you? The way you answer this simple question is what we call your identity. And the need to act consistent with your identity turns out to be one of the strongest forces known to man.

But who you are, how you behave, the way you carry yourself is different depending on who you're with isn't it? In fact, if I put you in a room with all your family, friends, and coworkers...you wouldn't know how to act!

We often have very different identities for the different communities of our lives. And its useful to know what those identities are...because they're influencing you right now.

For example, who are you in your family? Are you the funny one? The serious one? The overachiever? The underachiever? The rebel?

What about at work...are you the smart one? The lazy one? The honest one? The creative one?

Once your identity is established, it's incredibly hard to change it. Because you're compelled to act consistent with your identity no matter what. For example if you're the clown at family gatherings, even if you don't feel like telling jokes, or if you've grown out of it, you may feel compelled to do so anyway because...you're the "clown."

If you're the underachiever among your friends, when things start going well...you may sabotage yourself because hey...you're the "underachiever" and that's the 'you' people are comfortable with.

It's important to realize what your "relative identity" is with all the different communities of your life. Because they're no doubt shaping you.

The question is are they shaping you the way you want?

If not, it's up to you to change it. But remember your identity is not only your perception of yourself, but the way others perceive you. And people usually don't like change. It scares them. So they'll probably be uncomfortable with the new you and want you to stay the same.

So you have to be courageous enough to change and stick with it despite what those people think.

So the question is who are you? Or more importantly...who do you want to be?